Aliver Blogsite

Just another Survivors to Alivers Sites site

Wanna know the #1 reason for unhappiness?

Have you ever wondered why not everyone is happy and at peace? Unless you’re an analytical nerd like me you probably haven’t… but seriously, now that I mention it, isn’t it a curious mystery? Why in the world isn’t everyone walking around smiling and overflowing with peace?  Everyone wants to be happy don’t they?  So […]

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Your biggest problem isn’t what you think it is

Each of us has had our share of hard times both past and present… financial struggles broken relationships with family members emotional pain from past experiences Understandably we ponder these issues searching for solutions to address them. These aren’t our biggest problems though… Our biggest challenges are the ones we don’t actually even have. Many of […]

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Your life is what you choose it to be… choose wisely

We certainly didn’t choose to experience the trauma we did.  If we had it our way it never would have happened.  We wouldn’t even wish it on our worst enemy. We do however, choose what happens next.  Sometimes we’d like to believe we have no control because it relieves us of responsibility and allows us […]

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Be Perfectly Imperfect

Be your best.  Do your best……. Be THE best.  Do THE best. One word changes the directive in these two sets of sentences. We are living a world that asks us to do and be more than our best, it asks us to do and be THE best. Be THE smartest. Be THE prettiest. Be […]

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What If You Fall?

Everything thing can change in an instant. Scary isn’t it??…. or is it? Well, it depends on how you look at it. With a mind geared toward expecting the worst, yes, its very scary.  Many of us are in the habit of expecting the worse. What if it doesn’t work? What if she/he doesn’t like […]

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Its Not That COMPLICATED

“It’s COMPLICATED”  …Facebook status for relationships. Maybe you didn’t actually select it but in your mind you thought, “Man!  My relationship is so COMPLICATED.” For some of us, if asked, that’s how we’d label our lives… COMPLICATED. Someone asks about your life as a parent…COMPLICATED. Your efforts trying to parent your child whose mother/father you’re […]

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Arrival… Are you an Aliver? From “You Survived…Now What?”

AHHHHH!!!! You have arrived!!!!…… Ok, not really… We never really arrive. There is always work to do. The list you made of coping mechanisms, people, places, and things that you wanted to change was likely an extensive one and you probably have not addressed everything you would like to. That doesn’t mean you aren’t an […]

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Don’t hurt me and I won’t hurt you…unless I think you’re going to hurt me…then I might hurt you

I wrote a blog last week about always going first (click here to read) in which I talked about taking the risk to be vulnerable and lead by example.  I find myself back in the place that inspired that blog.  At this stage of being an Aliver, I’m finally to the point where I am […]

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Your story is a gift – Please share

I’m looking for people who are willing to share their story to be highlighted in a weekly feature I will be releasing soon called “Aliver Chronicles.”  My goal is to share the journeys of those who have experienced abuse, war, rape, divorce, financial devastation, loss of a loved one, and any other challenging life experience […]

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Avoiding Hurt = Avoiding Happiness

Everyone does it.  Just about everyone who’s ever been through anything engages in self-preservation. I’m not going to show him/her my true feelings because I don’t want to get hurt and that’s what happened last time I let someone close to me. I’m not going to develop relationships at work because last time I did […]

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